A Shattered Heart

“Get out of the way,” I screamed as loudly as I could. I careened the car to just narrowly avoid hitting the little girl by no more than a hairsbreadth. She had suddenly walked into the street out of nowhere, without any warning. I brought the car to a stop and felt my heart beating in my throat. “What were you thinking?” I shouted at her still angry by the fact she ran into the street but even more so by the fact I was terrified out of my mind of having come so close to hitting her and possibly taking her life. My mind raced a thousand miles a second. The only thought I had was what if it were one of my children and was about to begin another tirade of how foolish she was for running into the street until I saw her facial expression.

I looked into the little girls eyes and saw how frightened she truly was. Even more terrified than I had been for nearly hitting her. I took a deep breath, calmed myself and asked her name. She told me still shivering with fright and stuttering as she pronounced her name. “Why did you run into the road like that?” I asked now finally able to control the anger in my voice. “A dog was chasing me,” she said in a quiet voice and began to cry. I comforted the child and helped her find her way back home. As I pulled off from the child’s house, after having to explain to her mother what had happened, I breathed a sigh of relief.

I turned on the radio to listen to some music as I headed home. One of my favorite artists, Music Soul child, was singing one of my favorite melodies, Love. As I finally was beginning to settle after still being a little shaken from nearly hitting the little girl a news report interrupted the music. My heart stopped and blood ran cold as I listened to the reporter describe the scene of an accident. Apparently a little child was crossing the street in front of a bus that let her off and another bus driver trying to overtake hit and killed the child as the child was crossing the street.

For a moment I don’t know if I was simply in a bad dream or a living nightmare. The reporter continued to report how those persons who were on the scene attacked the driver in a rage. I felt comforted by that but also saddened at the same time. However, the full realization of the fact that it could have been me a few minutes earlier or even my child hit me like a ton of bricks. I felt a tear roll down my cheek, thinking of the child I narrowly missed, my own children, and the parents of that child, who now carried the burden of a shattered heart after losing their little one.

 A Moment of Clarity

The Bible speaks of God’s wrath in the Old Testament in many places. Yet even in God’s anger, there is always room for love. We daily cannot begin to fathom how much more God loves us than wants and desires to be angry over some of our foolish choices. Jesus spoke of being angry but not sinning. Anger alone is not a sin, yet how we deal with our anger can lead to sin or even salvation.  In his wrath Cain killed Abel, in his anger David condemned his own selfish actions, and even Moses in his anger caused himself not to be able to walk into the ‘Promise Land.’

Many times in our lives we face things that greatly affect us and stir us to anger. A lot of those times are in regard to things that have caused us to have a broken or even shattered heart. Yet even in our pain and anger, we can still learn to find hope and ask God to turn the pain of loss or even betrayal to something that can be used to bring glory to Heaven’s kingdom. It is not easy when someone hurts us to always forgive. Forgiveness is a process. It is not a onetime thing forgiving someone. It might take years until you are finally free from the pain someone has caused you or even you another individual. Yet the pursuit of love and forgiveness is easier than carrying the burden of anger and a shattered heart.

As we work daily to pursue excellence in our lives I encourage you to pursue love to overcome anger and hate and be grateful for each moment of life you are given and learn to be everyday a Beacon of Light.

 Beam of Light for the Week 

Anger is like a poison that saps away our strength and very lives. Yet love is the balm that heals all, pursue love and healing in your lives daily.